Attachment and Adoption Considerations
Attachment and Adoption Considerations
The purpose of this blog is to inform North American parents who may be considering adopting a toddler about a few of the issues that may arise with the child’s attachment. These issues include what happens when adopted children do not form attachments with their adoptive parents, why attachment is important and how attachment styles can influence a child’s brain, how an adopted child’s temperament plays a role in attachment, the age that a child is adopted at, and how communicative interactions influence attachment.
Attachment is extremely important for a child and their parent. It is the psychological and biological affectionate bond that develops between a primary caregiver, usually the mom and her infant (Parker, date unknown). This attachment can develop as early on as prenatally or it can develop postnatally, it is different for everyone. There are four types of attachment styles which include secure, insecure-ambivalent, insecure-avoidant and insecure-disorganized/disorientated (Parker, date unknown). Developing a secure attachment is ideal because a child’s attachment reflects how they see intimate relationships and the foundation of trust that carries on to adulthood. Research has been done to identify the differences between attachment styles by Mary Ainsworth who ran a study called The Strange Situation (Parker, date unknown).
A secure baby actively explores and gets upset when mom leaves but is happy when she returns. An insecure-ambivalent baby stays close to mom and become distressed when they are separated and are ambivalent when mom returns but still remain near her. An insecure-avoidant infant will show little distress when separated and may ignore their mom’s attempts to interact with them. Finally, the insecure-disorganized/disorientated infant is the most distressed upon separation and is considered the most insecure (Parker, date unknown). It has also been found that positive bonding during the first year with a baby and developing a secure attachment can allow a small hippocampus that was affected by stress to be restored to normal volume (Gerhardt, 2015). If a baby is in an orphanage then the first part of their life most likely includes some stressful events, and if adoptive parents are aware of this and work had to develop that secure attachment they can help their child’s brain develop. When children have insecure attachments, it can actually have a negative impact on their nervous system leaving them with an accelerated heart rate and autonomic arousal (Gerhardt, 2015). The insecurely attached child will also release high levels of cortisol under stress which increases activity in the right frontal brain which generates fearfulness, irritability and withdrawal from others (Gerhardt, 2015). These examples of the importance of attachment show how insecurely attached children can struggle and why it is crucial to be aware of these things when adopting, so parents will understand what they need to be doing for their child to be successful and happy.
As I stated before, attachment can develop as early as when mom gets pregnant, but it is also normal for attachments to not form until the baby is born (Gerhardt, 2015). A mom can pass her attachment style onto her baby through her womb just from her attachment status during the pregnancy (Gerhardt, 2015). If a baby is adopted this will not be the case for the adopted child and adoptive parent. This does not mean that attachments cannot be formed between parent and child, it just means they need to be worked on a little bit more because they do not have the jump start of connecting before the baby is born. When adopted children do not form attachments like I have previously listed as examples, there are negative consequences. There is not enough critical information or training to help adoptive parents understand the effects of non-attachment. Research has been done on Romanian children who were adopted when the Soviet Empire crumbled and one-third of the children had major difficulties developing close emotional attachments to their adoptive parents (Parker, date unknown). This has allowed for the discovery of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) which is the result of trauma or disruption to the attachment process within the first three years of a child’s life. There are numerous causes for why the attachment process is disrupted but a few examples include hospitalization of child/caregiver, emotional unavailability of a caregiver due to mental/physical illness, or birth/adoption of subsequent siblings (Parker, date unknown).
I am not providing this information to be discouraging, it is to make this information more well known and to help prevent this from happening. It is essential to know as much about a child’s history before adopting in order to meet the child at their emotional and developmental level (Parker, date unknown). If a child has experienced trauma, it is important to allow them to talk about it openly but on their terms, do not push for it. These children also do best with predictable patterns every day, they want to know their caregiver is in control and will help them feel stability. Disorganization and chaos can give children anxiety and may end up being disastrous for all parties involved in the family (Parker, date unknown). A nurturing, affectionate home environment can be therapeutic for a child as well as attachment parenting. This promotes sensitive responses to the baby and combines with physical contact (Parker, date unknown).
Physical contact can be crucial in forming attachments, but it must be on the child’s terms. “Kangaroo care” which is when a parent holds a child skin-to-skin has been studied to be extremely beneficial to the child and mother (Parker, date unknown). It is important to keep in mind that physical touch can be upsetting if a child has been a victim of abuse. Allowing a child to initiate any form of physical touch like a hug or hand-holding will in time allow trust to form between child and parent (Parker, date unknown). Parents are advised to be tolerant and comforting when possible with adopted children because we may not always know exactly what they have been through. It is advised to be consistent and has reasonable expectations for children because it will demonstrate reason, fairness and understanding to the child. Allow children to make their own choices so they develop a sense of control and decision-making skills (Parker, date unknown).
While adopting children can be risky, findings indicate that there are minimal differences in psychological functioning between children who are raised in adoptive families versus biological ones (Parker, date unknown). Adoption can be successful and very beneficial for children to give them a happy, healthy life they may not have had the experience to live if adoption did not occur. As long as parents are given the appropriate information, resources and support strong emotional attachments can be formed between child and parent, which will transfer to adulthood for the child allowing them to continue to create successful strong relationships with peers and romantic partners (Parker, date unknown). For more information regarding Lysa Parker’s information on the topic go to http://www.attachmentparenting.org/support/articles/adoption.
When it comes to a child’s temperament this can play a role in how they attach to their adoptive parents. Research has looked into what helps to promote secure attachments for adopted children at the early start of the relationship. Lionetti (2014) looked into how an adopted child’s temperament and both parent’s attachment state of mind influence one another and the chance of a secure attachment in the adoption. Before a child is adopted they are staying in an orphanage and the length of time they spend here is impactful on their development. The lack of sensitivity, responsiveness and stability from the caregivers influence the child’s attachment from the beginning (Lionetti, 2014). In Lionetti’s study, she discovered that the age of placement into adoptive families was the only significant moderator for insecure attachments, but not for disorganized attachments. This means that other factors related to the individual or caregivers may be involved which is promising for parents who adopt older children in knowing that these secure bonds can still be formed.
Temperament is defined as individual differences in reactivity and self-regulation, influenced by heredity, maturation and experience (Lionetti, 2014). It has been contended that attachment style is influenced by temperament, not with how it develops but how it is expressed. Looking at a parent’s attachment state of mind is how they guide their sensitivity and behaviour towards their children, and this is the main predictor of an infant’s attachment (Lionetti, 2014).
If a parent has a secure attachment, more than likely the child will have a secure attachment as well. The results showed that this is, in fact, true, when a mother has a secure attachment state of mind, this is a protective factor not only for secure attachment to be formed but also against disorganized attachment (Lionetti, 2014).
Even though I mentioned it briefly above I want to discuss one consideration in more detail that I feel is important. When adopting children to help form a secure attachment with them, and that is their age. A study done on attachment in adopted children with a focus on their age found that adoptions after the age of two can have a negative impact on attachment security (Escobar, & Santelices, 2013). This is most likely due to early deprivation in life which causes children to have more difficulties in forming close relationships. It was also found to be of concern when children are adopting after the age of six months because they have a risk of developing an insecure attachment, again this reiterates the importance of bringing this information to light so intervention strategies can be implemented for the post-adoption process (Escobar, & Santelices, 2013). This is not to say adopting children after the age of six months means parents are doomed, it just means that again it is extremely crucial for parents to be involved and work hard at developing those connections with the child. This study suggests allowing follow-ups with adoptive parents to be extended for longer periods of time may help promote the development of a secure attachment (Escobar, & Santelices, 2013).
Related to age as an important consideration and factor, is communicative interactions between adopted children and their adoptive parents. A study focusing mainly on adoptive mothers looked into whether or not adopted children had different communicative interactions and methods, and if this related to their attachment style (Graham, Mah, MacLean, Brooks, Nilsen, Morison, Fisher, & Ames, 2014). To explain this in more detail, researchers wanted to know if a mother could influence the regulation of her child’s activity with language, which in turn would influence their attachment security and attention difficulties if any. It was found that children who were adopted compared to those who were not adopted did not display any communicative differences or struggles (Graham et al., 2014). This suggests that if any early skills were affected by any deprivation, being in the adopted homes helped mitigate any long-term effects. This is positive news and gives hope that adopted children who may have been dealt a poor hand and struggled through the start of their life can turn it around and may not face forever consequences. The results also showed that when children displayed insecure attachment styles, mothers tended to use command statements as a response (Graham et al., 2014). This shows that the mother’s communication style can be affected by her child’s attachment style, which can lead to poorer quality mother-child interactions and conversations later on in life. Overall, attachment may not be influenced necessarily by a poor start to life but again on how a parent parents. If they are involved and communicate with the right state of mind in that secure attachment they can help their child form a secure attachment as well.
For further information, you can check out any of the empirical studies and articles used for this blog down below. I did not include everything and each link discusses these ideas in even more detail so feel free to check them out and leave any questions for me down below! Hopefully this was useful information to you, don’t forget to subscribe! Stay wise parents!
References
Children’s Services Council of Palm Beach County. (May 31st, 2018). Ask an expert: Physical touch and babies. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7JAot4vZYU
Gerhardt, S. (2015). Why Love Matters? Routledge.
Graham, A. S., Mah, W. T. J., MacLean, K., Brooks, L. B., Nilsen, E., Morison, S., Fisher, L., & Ames, E. (2014). An Examination of Communicative Interactions of Children From Romanian Orphanages and Their Adoptive Mothers. Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science, 46(1), 9-19. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0033916
Lionetti, F. (2014). What promotes secure attachment in early adoption? The protective roles of infants’ temperament and adoptive parents’ attachment. Attachment & Human Development, 16(6), 573-589. https://doi.org/10.1080/14616734.2014.959028
Parker, L. (unknown) Developing Emotional Attachments in Adopted Children. Attachment Parenting International. http://www.attachmentparenting.org/support/articles/adoption
thibs44. (January 17th, 2009). The Strange Situation-Mary Ainsworth. Youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTsewNrHUHU
tvoparents. (November 28th, 2010). Attachment: Why is Bonding with Baby Important? YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C6fY6RchNk4&t=127s
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